He loves me enough

This has been one of those trying weeks.

Emotions seriously out of whack, crying unnecessary tears of disappointment.

But in the midst of the pain and anguish, God’s shown that He does know what is best for me.

And He loves me enough to withhold from me something that I thought I wanted but was completely out of His plan.

Sometimes we place unrealistic expectations on those around us, whether it be our friends, colleagues, spouses.  We put them up on a pedestal  and we begin to link our happiness and sometimes our contentment to how they treat us or respond to us.  I know I did.

And how loving is He to care enough that each time I begin to ground my happiness on whether or not someone meets my expectations, He withholds that relationship from me.

Once I refocus and get my head on straight again, once I go to Him as my source of joy and satisfaction, it’s like He allows me to have it back again, keeping an eye on me and making sure I don’t let my own flesh get in the way of something He has gifted me.  He is after all a jealous God – when things or people start to take His place in our lives, He has the authority, power and love to take those things/people away.

You give and take away, my heart will choose to say, Lord blessed be your name.  

Lord, thank you for clarity like never before.  Forgive me for abusing what you had gifted me.  Help me to value and treasure what is presently before me and respect and love those around me within the boundaries you’ve already laid out for me.  Thank you for giving me insight to your grand plans for me and thank you for your patience with me.

“Keep my commandments and live, and keep my law and teaching as the apple of your eye.  Bind them on your fingers, write them on the tablet of your heart.  Say to skilful and godly wisdom, you are my sister and regard understanding or insight as your intimate friend.” – Proverbs 7:2-4 AMP

– Ames –

P.S. Enjoying this song right now…

not like, LOVE this – How He Loves Us

There’s been a lot happening down this end; too much to comprehend, too much to condense into a few lines before slumber befalls me.

All I’ll say is, Oh how HE loves me!  

He is jealous for me 
Love’s like a hurricane, I am a tree 
Bending beneath the weight of His wind and mercy 
When all of a sudden, I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory 
and I realize just how beautiful You are and how great your affections are for me. 
Oh, how He loves us so 
Oh, how He loves us 
How He loves us so. 

Yeah, He loves us 
Woah, how He loves us 
Woah, how He loves us 
Woah, how He loves. 

So we are His portion and He is our prize, 
Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes 
If grace is an ocean we’re all sinking 
So heaven meets earth like a sloppy wet kiss and my heart turns violently inside of my chest 
I don’t have time to maintain these regrets when I think about the way 

That he loves us, 
Woah, how He loves us 
Woah, how He loves us 
Woah, how He loves 

He loves us, 
Woah, how He loves us 
Woah, how He loves us 
Woah, how He loves 

Well, I thought about You the day Stephen died and You met me between my breaking 
I know that I still love You, God, despite the agony 
…they want to tell me You’re cruel 
But if Stephen could sing, he’d say it’s not true, cause… 

Cause He loves us, 
Woah, how He loves us 
Woah, how He loves us 
Woah, how He loves 

Yeah, He loves us 
Woah, how He loves us 
Woah, how He loves us 
Woah, how He loves

– How He Loves Us, Jesus Culture

– Ames –

all over again

Heard these lyrics for the first time today and fell in love all over again:

Did You raise the sun for me?
Or paint a million stars that I might
Know Your majesty?
Is Your voice upon the wind?
Is everything I’ve known marked
With my maker’s fingerprints?

I can’t imagine life without Him.

‘Cause all You are, is all I want, always
Draw me close in Your arms
Oh God, I wanna be with You

– Always, Hillsong

I’m overwhelmed by His love for me.  How He brings people into my life to affirm me and lift me up.  The fact that He would choose me and use me… for that, I will be forever grateful.

My life is Yours.

♥ Ames

Easter Reflections 3

In the last post, I mentioned that there were two words that came to mind when contemplating the meaning of Easter.  The first was ‘redemption’ and the second is one that I’d like to expand on today: ‘love’.

Jesus redeemed us from eternal separation from God so that we could experience the blessings and good plans He has for us not because we earned it.  The infamous passage in the Bible does not say that,’Because we tried to be good citizens of the world, that God gave his only begotten Son…’ neither does it say, ‘Because we gave to the needy, didn’t lie this week, gave up our seat for the old lady, that God gave his only begotten Son…’ No.

John 3:16 says, ‘For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son that whoever so believed in Him shall not perish but have eternal life.’

He loved and continues to love ALL of humanity and desires them to come into full awareness of their own transgressions/wrongdoings/failed attempts of being righteous or good so they can accept His saving grace and run desperately into His loving arms, ready to embrace us.

We watched a condensed version of the Passion of the Christ this weekend and I was struck once again of the enormous pain and suffering that Jesus undeservingly went through for people who spit on His face, denied and condemned Him.  He had no sin but took on the sins of the world so that we could be restored back into a relationship with God, the way it was meant to be from the very beginning.  And not only that, but in Him we have victory over all addictions, troubles, challenges and even death itself because He has already overcome it all.  When we are connected to Him, we have the power to overcome.  Freedom is ours for the taking because of His Great Love.  There is nothing to lose except our bondage to old mindsets and old patterns of living.

Greater love has no one than this, that He lay down His life for His friends. – John 15:13

♥ Ames

delirious with joy

Is it possible to be delirious with joy?

This past day I’ve had this giddy feeling and I seem to always feel a slight smile on my face, even in the midst of the dreary, stormy Melbourne weather.  It’s like being in love for the first time but this time, I’m not in love with the boy who will go on to break my heart, I’m in love with the Saviour who nursed me back into wholeness.  So perfectly too.  The beauty of His healing power is that it won’t even leave a scar once the process is complete (reminds me of how Daniel’s friends walked out of the fiery furnace without even the smell of smoke on their clothes).

For the FIRST TIME, in what has been a difficult 2+ years, the clouds that were hanging over my head have totally lifted and the forecast is clear, blue skies here on in :D.  Those clouds will never bother me again, praise Jesus!  I feel so detached from all that hurt and pain… I look back now and wonder, ‘Seriously?  Did that really all happen to me?’  It’s almost like it’s another girl’s story now but I still get to retain the benefits of the life lessons, the character-shaping and the experience of God’s grace in a new and personal way.  I get the better deal at the end of it all :).

God is so good.  He is so faithful.  Earlier this week, my BFF sent me a text with this quote, saying it reminded her of me:

God can heal a broken heart but first we need to give him all the pieces.

It’s true.  I can testify to this truth.  Why I held onto that last piece boggles my mind but I’m so glad I finally let go of my own shame and guilt.  Freedom is found in Christ, and Christ alone!

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

I think Romans 8:28 is fast becoming my life verse haha


Oh Babe,

I can’t wait to see the amazing love story God has planned for us!  I guess He’s already working on it as I type this so in a way, we’re already living it… maybe we’re in the prologue right now haha

Anyway, I know it’s gonna be awesome – not because I’m building up a false hope about what courtship and marriage will look like, but because my hope is in the Author of Love and He is going to do a much better job of writing this story than either of us… I know it’s going to make people stand back and go, ‘Wow, that had to be God, had to be of God.’  I love you sooooooo much already and my heart will beat only for you.

Always and forever,

Your girl.

♥ Ames

I’m so happy

I’m so getting the Sunday school kiddies to do this for Christmas!  They may not like me for it hehe but it doesn’t matter because….

I’m so happy, so very happy

I’ve got the love of Jesus in my heart—–

I’m so happy so very happy,

I’ve got the love of Jesus in my heart.

*sing with me*

I’ve got the joy joy joy joy down in my heart….


♥ Ames

I’ll do whatever it takes.

I was hesitant at first but the joy and passion he exuded was contagious and I could feel a smile spread over my face and the weight of last night’s decision lifted from my shoulders.

I’m floored once again at His love for me.   When I began to doubt, He sent someone to minister right to my soul and He gave me the quiet reassurance to know that I’m on the right path.  There are still many things I’m uncertain about but one thing is clear – God’s got something pretty amazing up His sleeve :).  But for all these things to come to past, I must be diligent in doing what I’ve been given the responsibility to do.

Lord, please help me.  I’ll do whatever it takes.  Continue to show me what it means to keep myself clean and pure.  Continue to purge me of incorrect mindsets that I’ve unknowingly acquired from the world.  Separate me from the things of the world and the ways of the world so that I may be a pure, holy vessel unto You.

Thank you for still using me in spite of all my past mistakes and shortcomings.  You are amazing.

♥ Ames

P.S. For the record, there is always a temptation to sin – Stay alert! Watch out for your great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour (1 Peter 5:8).  And all questions raised were carefully considered and answered in the positive prior to any decision.  Best thing you can do is to pray for God to reveal these realities to you.

lost in divine romance

On the way home from a truly fabulous breakfast, I heard this playing on the radio:

Well I must admit this world often tempts my fallen eyes
And I fall in love with all my earthly home provides
But I make this vowing decision, to get lost in divine romance
And at times I forsake my first love, but He woes my heart again

‘Cause He’s the God of second chance

And I’m looking for the narrow way back to where I belong
And I’m looking for the narrow way that leads me to my home

Narrow, Nathan Tasker

This resonates so much with the journey I’ve been on lately.  I’m in awe with how He just beckons me to know Him more… getting ‘lost in divine romance’.  Sometimes it takes losing your way to find your way back again… if that makes sense.

This was the first time I’d heard of Nathan Tasker so after a bit of digging, I found out his family has experienced a tragedy of their own recently and this was a song that was birthed from it (yet to be recorded):

All The While

In the valley
In our suffering
When the shadow steals the light

In the moment
we are breaking
there our hearts will still decide

To find a song
when there is none

All the while
knowing you are good
All the while
looking to the cross
All the while
hidden in the shadow of your wings

In the waiting
In the quiet
When the answer’s slow to come

There your presence
will remind us
though your silent, we are loved

We’ll find a song
when there is none

You are with us in our sorrow
You are with us in our weeping
You are with us in our sowing
You are with us

You are with us in our hoping
You are with us in our healing
You are with us in our reaping
You are with us, ever with us!

– 2011 Tasker/Fieldes

I have often thought that the greatest tragedy in life is not death, or pain, or loss, or suffering. It is to experience any of these things and to be truly alone. It is no surprise that the ultimate promise of God (incarnated in Jesus) is this: “Never will I leave you”. After all, what is heaven apart from the eternal keeping of this promise?

So, I have learned one simple thing this past month after many tears and questions, with still more to come – God’s silence is not to be confused with His absence.

– Nathan Tasker

While Melbourne is engrossed in the Footy Grand Final, I think I shall go download his album now.

♥ Ames

[addition: I can’t believe I actually sat and watched some of the grand final… I guess, there’s always a first :).]