Impatience uncovered

Oh wow. I just realised that I have used the word “impatient” at least 7 times in the last couple of posts… *sigh*

I think that being impatient really stems from not truely believing that God’s got the best plan for our lives. We’re impatient because we want things to happen on our timeline, not knowing or understanding that whatever we have before us is there for a reason, His purposes. 

I want to repent of this. I need to repent of this.

Impatience also means, in my view, that you start striving to make something happen on your terms or timeline. That equates to stepping outside God’s will which can lead to some dangerous consequences.

So I’m resolving here and now to be patient with life. To relax and chill over things I choose not to control coz I’ve given Him reign in that area of my life.

To not get too enthusiastic about people I click with coz it might scare them away. To not put unrealistic expectations on others. To take things slowly and be at peace with all those around me. To love greatly and forgive quickly.

I’m not saying I’ll get it right all the time but this is the direction I want to travel in.

– Ames –

overwhelmed again

Lately, I’ve had those moments where I’m just overwhelmed by God’s grace and His love for me.

Like when:

I hung out with an old friend and thanked the Lord that I didn’t end up marrying him (and he married someone perfect for him).

I grieved over a broken friendship and had someone to comfort me while the tears fell.

I was supremely blessed by an anointed teacher of the Word of God.

I saw God’s provisions for a lost sister of mine.

My prayers for a spiritual mentor came true!

I spoke about the loving community that God had brought around me in one of the lowest times in my life.

I recalled how much growing has happened in the last 3 years.

I was reminded of how we serve a God that redeems, renews and restores things that we thought were lost.

I realised that sitting across from each other with my kids and your kids running around in the background, isn’t such a far-fetched idea after all :).

And I find myself here on my knees again
Caught up in grace like an avalanche
Nothing compares to this love, love, love
Burning in my heart
– Like An Avalanche, Hillsong

Praise God for His faithfulness.

– Ames –

secrets

This week I found out a few things.

Some things shocked me.

Some things grieved me.

Some things surprised me.

Some things which never crossed my mind before.

But in all these newfound pieces of knowledge, I was grateful.

Grateful for those who felt that they could share with me those things that had been kept hidden.

Grateful for the openness and at times blunt honesty with which opinions, fears or worries have been voiced.

Grateful for the opportunity to minister to my siblings in Christ :).

This is what it means to be part of a community of believers – to carry each others burdens, to walk alongside, to lift another up when they have fallen, to love even when another’s heart is hardened, to watch out for each other, to support each other through the tough times and to rejoice in the little victories and graces of everyday living.

You may have given up, but I won’t give up on you.  And neither will He.  I’m here, He’s here.  

We’ll get through this, one day at a time.  

“Let us not become weary in doing good,for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.” – Galatians 6:9-10.

– Ames –

overlook it

When people fail you… what do you do?

“Good sense makes one slow to anger, and it is his glory to overlook an offense.”

– Proverbs. 19:11

I understand that people disappoint.

I understand that people may not do things the way you want to do things.

But is that really a good enough reason to part ways?

“Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.”

– 1 Corinthians 13:7–8

God calls us to love our neighbour as ourselves.  It’s easy to love someone when they agree with you.  It’s easy to love someone when they treat you right.  It’s hard to love someone when they disagree with you.  It’s hard to love someone when they’ve hurt you.

I look to Jesus.  While he hung on a cross, beaten and bruised, he did not curse those who put him there.

Instead he said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.” (Luke 23:34)

You can’t love them on your own strength.  It’s in those situations that you gotta love out of the love of God.  It’s in those situations that you’ve got to draw on the strength and love of God.

See more at Desiring God on this topic: More Thoughts on Friends Who Fail You

– Ames –

such as these

To know and be known.

To understand and be understood.

To accept and be accepted.

To encourage and be encouraged.

To learn from and learn with.

To trust and be trusted.

To love and be loved.

Is there nothing better than a friendship that has Christ at the centre?

There is nothing quite like it.

Thank you for friends such as these.

♥ Ames

To my FFL

Hey you.

We haven’t spoken in a long time.  I hope you are well.  I miss you.  Not in a romantic sense.  Just your friendship and the familiarity that comes with it.

I miss your lame jokes.

I miss your awkwardness.

I miss your kindness and care.

I miss our comfortable conversations.

I miss knowing what’s going on in your life.

I remember when hugs were a foreign concept to you and smiling was only something that happened on the rare occasion.  Now hugs are the norm and you flash your pearly whites in nearly every photo I see of you.

I know we’re travelling different paths now but I just wanted to let you know (if you ever read this) that I’m so proud of you.  I’m so proud of the man of God that you have become.  I love that you are a role model that young boys can now look up to in your community.  I love how your life is a living testimony of what God can do when we give him some room to move in our lives.  I’m blessed to have been there to witness the transformation and see the fruits of God’s love and mercy at work in your life.

I hope we’ll meet again one day soon.  With the precious girl you have by your side and my amazing guy who’s on his way… can’t wait ;).

♥ Ames

A Story: Friend For Life, Part 4 – how it is now

Part 1 , Part 2 and Part 3.  Now the final installment…

He changed.

Dramatically.

Almost overnight, there was something different about him – everyone could see it.  The prayers I’d been praying over his life had finally been answered!  Even now, I praise God for His faithfulness.  He never gave up on him.  We were personal witnesses to God’s radical transforming power and I feel so humbled to have been a part of His plan to ultimately bring my friend to the end of himself, to bring Him to the point where there was nowhere else to run but into the loving arms of the Father.

We settled back into our friendship but with a difference… I could see a light in His eyes as he spoke about God and shared his own experiences of God with me.  He has encouraged me so much and at times, I feel like he has surpassed me in my understanding of who God is – which is awesome.

It wasn’t all smooth sailing though.  It took 5 months for me to realise what a big mistake I had made by entering into that first relationship.  We broke things off on mutual terms but I was severely brokenhearted when the other boy started seeing his old girlfriend again and then a few months later was engaged (ah, I said I would leave it for another post!).  But it allowed me to feel the pain that I had put my friend through the months before and it was such a comfort to know that if he made it through, surely God would bring me through it as well.   I was so thankful that he stood by my side even though I had hurt him so much in the past.

Even though God had moved in his life in such an amazing way, that did not necessarily mean that his feelings for me were automatically extinguished.  Through my own personal pain, I could not see his words and actions were clothed in an unrequited love for me.  Actually, that’s not true.  I knew he still cared for me but I knew that it would be entirely unfair to him if I was to just fall into his loving arms to ease my own pain.  I didn’t want to put him in the position that I had just been in – not only would that be unwise but it would have been entirely selfish of me.  So I left it for him to get his feelings sorted – it was not something I could help him with.  All I could do was reassure him that we would be ‘Friends for life’ and in my heart of hearts and I knew that’s all we would ever be.

Now, 4 years on from that first summer day, we’re both doing well :).  He is dating one of my dearest sisters in Christ and I think it is for the long haul.  We don’t talk as much as we used to but that has been partly due to my own personal decision to distance myself so that I do not interfere in their relationship in any way (and also moving to another church has meant I don’t see him on a weekly basis anymore).  However, he remains one of the sweetest, most generous and kindest guys I know and what’s more is that he has a solid faith in God to back it up.  He is one of the finest guys I’ve ever met and I’m so thankful to call him friend.

Our lives have taken different paths but I’m thankful they crossed and know that (if you ever read this) I am so proud of you, happy for you and love you very much.  I pray that God continues to do great things in you and through your life to inspire others to pursue the things of God more.

♥ Ames